Tonight I took a nice relaxing bubble bath (more relaxing than you think, I had to shut the window because my neighbor likes to smoke....not cigarettes....if you catch my drift). My ginormous cankles unswelled enough for me to actually see that ankle bone poking out on the side, yes! My due date is 2 days away, oh my gosh. These are the things that keep coming to my mind over and over again, and they aren't thoughts of the actual labor and delivery, they are of the aftermath:
Am I even going to be a good mom? I slack off with a lot of things for me and I know I can't do that with a child.
How much is Jason and my relationship going to change? It has been us for the past 3years, I am spoiled by him!
Can I take this much responsibility?
Can I raise a child in this world right now and teach her the best ways?
I worry about everything, right now, the future, the past......
I am still a kid it feels like, do I really want to grow up?
These are just a few that I have been thinking about......and tonight while sitting in the bath watching this little sweetie move around in my belly I realized I need to stop being selfish and negative with how much this is going to change my life, I need to think of the positive changes. Like how much it will change our family for the good and it will be the best learning experience. I am sure every new mom is terrified because they don't know what to expect. I have had so much advice given to me and I am so grateful for it, but the best I have heard is to do what I feel is best for me and my child and to use the advice as help, not guidelines.
I am so glad I have a wonderful family that will help me out. My Mom and Stephanie are coming out right after Lila is born and Bailey will be here after them. I have amazing friends here that will be there for me too, I feel like I have definitely been blessed with the most wonderful friends while being here. The best thing is that I know I can always turn to our Heavenly Father for help and I am so grateful for that!
New Year's cabin trip with friends
2 years ago
10 comments:
What a cool update! And to be honest since you guys have been out here we have really gotten to know both of you well. And there is not a doubt in my mind that you both will be absolutely awesome parents and Lila is so blessed to be born to such a loving, faithful and caring couple. You guys are awesome and thanks for being such great friends!
Nate
I am so excited for you to be a mommy. You will be great. Just listen to the spirit and enjoy! Love ya!
Hey, did you get a sub for RS on Sunday?
Ah! I's so excited for you. I know that you are not asking for advice, but since it's on my mind i'm going to share it.
Love your husband more. It's easy to let the baby take precedence because she will fuss and needs changing and will be hungry, but don't forget about your hubby. He'll need it more too.
Can't wait to see her!
Being a mommy is humbling and strengthening at the same time. It is a testimony builder about Heavenly Father's unending love for us and the blessing of the Atonement!!!
Pull together and be strong together!
You will be awesome!!!
These fears are all totally normal. I felt the exact same way before my 1st was born. You will be surprised at how much is instinct. You are going to be a great mommy! Good luck, can't wait to see pics of the new babe :)
Big hugs, you will do great. Just remember, baby doesn't know that you don't know what you are doing. Someone told me that when Mylie was born and I have always remembered it. You will be an awesome mom. You have an amazing capacity to love and that is the most important thing. I CAN'T wait to see in ... soon!!! I love you.
I have been thinking about you alot lately and wondering how everythings going! I dropped something off at your mom's house lastnight for you, she is going to bring it to you when she comes. I hope you like it!
Aww sista! I love you. And I can't wait for you to have Lila, because I can't wait to have a new baby niece! The others are just getting too old! Good luck, you will be an awesome mama! By the way, according to your baby update, Lila is already one day old!! :)
Courtney, your questions are valid. Your gut is right about the changes and you have instincts too, so no need to second guess!! You will be a great mommy. Jason a great dad. No one will know her like you will so you will have the stamina and you can ask for help when you want and pace yourself a bit!! And if you just want to just hold her, ask for her back! :)
Luv ya-
I have no doubt that you will be an amazing mom. Lila is so lucky to have you and Jason for parents. I am so excited to meet her. And so excited to be able to help you out!
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